Diary Of A Busker Day 2613 Wednesday October 15th 2025 Winchester.
When I came into town in the morning The Two Henrys were at the top spot but as I’d been there yesterday I didn’t even bother to see if they’d left when I came in a few hours later; I headed straight for the Nando’s spot, today with the shiny Squier. At the end of the first song, Albatross, a man who’d been sitting on one of the benches to my left walked by saying ’79 next week’, which I thought was weird, as he looked not more than 60. ‘Sorry?’ I said. ‘Peter Green, Fleetwood Mac, 79 next week.’ (In fact, it’s TWO weeks).
Half an hour in and the coinage is bad…there’s a brown dog tied up outside Marks & Spencer barking every three seconds, pining for its owner. This goes on for ten minutes until the owner appears; I’d actually stopped playing for a couple of minutes as I couldn’t concentrate! Not long after that a very tall man comes up, points to my album propped up on the big flower pot and says ‘Can you stop using our property to put your stuff on.’ (it’s not a question). I say ‘Sorry?’ and he repeats the non question ‘Can you stop using our property to put your stuff on. I AM one of the managers’ and walks into Nando’s, not giving me time to respond. I just started laughing but like a good little busker, I remove the offending article, leaning it against the front wheel of the bike. What a twat, in fact, a power-crazed twat, at that. I think I’ll consider him the key contender for the Arsehole Of The Day award.
The coinage remained terrible right up to the two hour mark, with less than £15 in the kitty. However, it took a dramatic turn upwards with the arrival of Jeff from New York and his silent wife Joyce. ‘HEY MAN! HOW YA DOIN’?! COME ON EVERYONE, LET’S GET SOME CLAPPIN’ HAPPENIN’!’ – Jeff shouts as he puts a fiver in, then a minute later he picks the fiver up…
‘I tell you what. I’m taking this back.’
‘Jeff, you know that when that fiver hits the case, it’s mine.’
‘No…listen, I’m going to give you THIS one (he produces a tenner) instead, IF you can play a song.’
‘Sure, but what if I don’t know it?’
‘Actually…no, you can have this…COME ON PEOPLE! LISTEN TO THIS GUY…GET HIM ON A PLANE…BUDWEISER!’ shouts Jeff, clearly in a stream of consciousness frame of mind. I can’t decide if he’s drunk or just an exuberant American. He doesn’t smell of alcohol – I know this because he hugs me a few times and puts his face right up to mine, which is something I can’t handle. I think he’s definitely had a couple of drinks, which means Joyce probably has but she remains silent throughout. Tell a lie, after Jeff has given me the tenner, no, two tenners, Joyce opens her purse and hands me a £20 note.
‘Joyce, that’s a lot of money.’
‘We got it, we got a lot of money. It’s no problem’ says Jeff.
‘Hey look, there’s a place opposite Ottoman’s – you know where you played? You’d be great there, WE GOTTA GET YOU PLAYIN’ THERE! HEY COME ON EVERYBODY! THIS GUY…COME ON!’
I couldn’t care less about playing again in Southampton but I play along with Jeff’s exuberance and suggest he videos me so he can show whoever it is he wants me to play for. But he can’t seem to get his phone right for videoing me. He takes ages! Finally he sorts it out and I do Here Comes The Sun, then he says ‘Great man! Hey, this place, you know, they like soft music. They had some guy with an accordion…an accordion, you know?’
‘Yeah, I know what an accordion is. I’ve got one.’
‘Yeah, he was a GENIUS! Incredible, man! But they like soft music…’
‘OK, why don’t you record me doing the Gymnopedie?’
‘What? What’s that?’
‘This one (I play the first bars)’
‘Yeah, let’s do it! Wait (he tinkers with his phone again for a while)…yeah! Not now, when I say, OK?’
‘OK Jeff.’
‘Yeah…not yet…OK…no…WAIT! OK…now!’ and he gets me doing the Gymnopedie (eventually). How long you here for?’
‘I’m only going to do another two songs, Jeff, as I’m getting cold.’
‘Yeah great, what are you gonna do?’
‘I don’t know…Space Oddity and the James Bond theme.’
‘YEAH! COME ON EVERYONE!’ and he sits down at one of the FIVE GUYS tables to my left, where Joyce has been sitting after she gave me the £20. After Space Oddity, Jeff gets up and walks off, leaving Joyce on her own. I do Bond then pack up and there’s no sign of Jeff. Before I leave I go over to Joyce and ask if she’s alright. She just smiles and that’s it. It’s weird with some couples. Jeff doesn’t stop talking so Joyce doesn’t have to. Or maybe she gave up long ago or was never bothered about it. I’m hoping he doesn’t get me another gig!