Diary Of A Busker Day 324 Tuesday February 5th 2013 Winchester High Street, opposite Vodafone Time: 1:38-3:01pm
Quite a cold day but fortunately the wind’s not too bad, not like up near WH Smiths. I debut my revised arrangement of Norwegian Wood, which is; instead of playing the melody at the bottom of the neck, like on the record, which gets monotonous, I’m occasionally playing it an octave higher to imitate the sitar part; a shrewd move, I think. I also debut another Fab song – Tommy Emmannuel’s version of Lady Madonna, with the bass and melody played at the same time. I’ve also been practising his version of Day Tripper, but that’s more difficult, so no airing of that one today. In fact, awhile ago, a man out here told me the great T.E. is playing at The Anvil in Basingstoke sometime in March and I’ve been trying to get a ticket but the stupid website doesn’t seem to work and no one answers the phone at the box office. On the website, among the SOLD OUT concerts are Jools Holland and Chas & Dave. Tommy Emmannuel isn’t even in the SELLING FAST list. There is truly no justice in the world.
My racist-old-lady-regular Barbara turns up and after the obligatory ‘your hands must be cold’ intro, starts up. ‘There’s all these foreigners around. Three down the road, doing nothing…taking all the jobs.’ I stand up for the job-taking foreign scum – ‘I know of quite a few English people, Barbara, who sit on their arses all day, watching TV, or watching themselves on Jeremy Kyle, smoking and drinking and getting paid by the social security to do it. They’re not foreign, Barbara. They’re white.’ She’s not having it. ‘Well, I don’t like them, coming here, taking the jobs. That’s why there’s no jobs for us.’ I’m not having it! ‘Barbara, I know for a fact there are useless English people who REFUSE to work.’ After another ‘Well, I don’t like them’, she changes the subject – ‘Well, don’t get cold hands (too late, Barbara)…I think you should go home.’ I AM getting pretty cold, but am still able to play OK – it must be about 4 degrees. I’ve been working it out and there must be a certain temperature, and if it goes below that, even ever so slightly, I have to stop after ten minutes. But if it’s above that, even EVER SO SLIGHTLY, I can play for however long I want.
Just over an hour in, when I’m thinking of stopping, a young woman comes up and after some seconds I realise it’s Madeleine, the French singer. I ask if she wants to sing here. She says she will after I’m finished, and asks how its been. I say I don’t know, I’ll have to do a quick coinage count…it’s 8 or 9 pounds. ‘That’s alright, eh?’ she says. I say I suppose so and that I’ll do two or three more songs, then she can take over. She sits down against the wall next to me and I ask if she likes The Beatles. Yes she does. I say ‘OK, I’ll do this one for you’ and go into Here Comes The Sun, and during that and the next one, Norwegian Wood, I get more coinage than I got for the whole previous hour and I reckon it’s not because of the songs but it’s because of Madeleine, who’s a lot prettier than me! Or maybe people think she’s my daughter – ‘Oh look, he’s out here in the freezing cold, trying to provide for his family.’ In fact, I turn and say to her, ‘I reckon it’s because of you!’ ‘Maybe I’m a good luck charm’ she says.
Two young boys come up. One puts a brand new crisp fiver in the bucket. I ask if they want a CD and I’m not sure they understand but one points to my sign that says “CDs £5.” I again ask – would they like a CD? They shake their heads. They maybe foreign; I’ll have to alert Barbara…
Before the last song, I announce to Madeleine that I’m going to do James Bond. She says ‘Which one?’ ‘James Bond – you’ll know.’ She probably thought I was going to do Goldfinger or the new one. She might not even know the original theme. Halfway through Bond, the Man With Two Wives walks by, accompanied by one. In passing he utters a remark, something about the cold weather. I turn to Madeleine and say ‘See that guy, he’s got two wives.’ Anyway, at the end of Bond, she says ‘That’s great!’ I inform her that it’s my own arrangement, I then tell her about the MWTW – how he used to be in Saddam Hussein’s government, how he’s writing a book about it, and under their law, he’s allowed seven wives. Madeleine says, ‘Seven, I thought it was four.’
Earnings: £21.02